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At what point does old age arrive?

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    Yenix
    Valued Member

  • Yenix
    replied
    Originally posted by Nik View Post
    We'd had our previous car a dozen years, my subconscious could find it in supermarket or mall car parks without fail.

    Our new car was bigger, a different shape, a different colour, and apparently had chameleon skin as I kept losing it in plain sight...

    Got so bad, I bought a budget GARMIN GPS to use the track-back.

    I could NOT make that work.

    In fact, I learned to recognise our car before I figured the Garmin's weird menus...
    ;-)
    Well, cannot decide if it's more funny or sad actually. :)

    I am in my late 30s and losing my car in a covered mall parking seems to become my weekly routine. And you know what? GPS does not work in covered parkings.

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  • SonofLiberty
    Valued Member

  • SonofLiberty
    replied
    I don't know. I am only early 50s. I hope it is a couple of decades away or even longer.

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  • Nik
    Valued Member

  • Nik
    replied
    We'd had our previous car a dozen years, my subconscious could find it in supermarket or mall car parks without fail.

    Our new car was bigger, a different shape, a different colour, and apparently had chameleon skin as I kept losing it in plain sight...

    Got so bad, I bought a budget GARMIN GPS to use the track-back.

    I could NOT make that work.

    In fact, I learned to recognise our car before I figured the Garmin's weird menus...
    ;-)

    Leave a comment:

  • Nik
    Valued Member

  • Nik
    replied
    I met an old guy this morning, then realised it was the mirrored wardrobe.

    Took myself down to the 'mall', got a good hair-cut.

    Tipped the guy extra as 'Danger Money'...

    Leave a comment:

  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    Banned

  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    replied
    Originally posted by Morgan101 View Post
    That's why we tell them Rich. We have to laugh because we are too big to cry.

    >sniff< waaah.....HAHHAHA!!!

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  • Morgan101
    Valued Member

  • Morgan101
    replied
    That's why we tell them Rich. We have to laugh because we are too big to cry.

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  • Applejack
    Valued Member

  • Applejack
    replied
    You know you are old when you realize old age doesn't last that long.

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  • RICHFL
    Valued Member

  • RICHFL
    replied
    These jokes are funny until you get OLD!!!!!!

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  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    Banned

  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    replied
    An old woman was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. 'Careful,' he said, 'CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!'

    The wife stared at him. 'What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?' The old man calmly replied, 'I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving.'

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  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    Banned

  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    replied
    One for the Ibuprofen gang...


    A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool… After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?' 'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'

    Leave a comment:

  • SonofLiberty
    Valued Member

  • SonofLiberty
    replied
    LMAO! Excellent thread. The laughs were badly needed and well received.

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  • Morgan101
    Valued Member

  • Morgan101
    replied



    Ed and his wife Norma go to the state fair every year,

    And every year Ed would say,

    " Norma, I'd like to ride in that helicopter "

    Norma always replied,

    " I know Ed , but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks,

    And fifty bucks is fifty bucks!

    One year Ed and Norma went to the fair, and Ed said,

    " Norma, I'm 75 years old.

    If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance"

    To this, Norma replied,

    " Ed, that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks"

    The pilot overheard the couple and said,

    " Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny!

    But if you say one word it's fifty dollars."

    Ed and Norma agreed and up they went.

    The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard.

    He did his daredevil tricks over and over again,

    But still not a word...

    When they landed, the pilot turned to Ed and said,

    "By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed! "

    Ed replied,

    " Well, to tell you the truth I almost said something when Norma fell out,

    But you know, Fifty bucks is fifty bucks! "


    I could keep this thread going forever. Lots of material of the Senior variety.

    Enjoy!
    Morgan101
    Valued Member
    Last edited by Morgan101; 12-07-2018, 09:17 AM.

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  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    Banned

  • GrizzlyetteAdams
    replied
    Hahahaha!!!!! I had forgotten about that one!!! It never gets old because it is so funny. Thanks for reviving a classic!

    Morg, if you like that shirt, Amazon has all kinds of variations to tickle your fancy:

    https://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&ke...l_1q31k496ch_e

    Leave a comment:

  • Applejack
    Valued Member

  • Applejack
    replied
    Hubby almost fell on the floor laughing at that one. Good one Morgan.

    Leave a comment:

  • Morgan101
    Valued Member

  • Morgan101
    replied
    Grizz: I love that. I have to get one of those!!! I will have to find some more to keep this going.

    Grizz: This one keeps your Cajun trend going:
    DIRTY OLD MEN

    An elderly man in Louisiana owned a large farm for many years.


    He had a large pond in the back. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts and some apple and peach trees.


    One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond to look it over as he hadn't been there in a while.


    Before he went he grabbed a 5 gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.


    As he neared the pond he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he got closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond.


    He made all the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.


    One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave".


    The old man replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or watch you get out of the pond naked".


    Holding up the bucked he said,...."I'm here to feed the alligator".


    Some old men can still think fast.








































    Morgan101
    Valued Member
    Last edited by Morgan101; 12-06-2018, 09:07 AM.

    Leave a comment:

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