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  • #16
    yeah yeah yeah

    Dude, I totally understand your situ. My husband is not quite so bad, but I have not really amassed anything but earthquake preparedness stuff. We have kids and I'm on prozac so he sees is as some sort of maternal instinct coupled with OCD. Which could be, but then again, he is an engineer and has NO imagination of what could happen. "It will never happen." he says. Yeah, riiiiight. I've consigned myself to tucking things away, little by little, in our camping and earthquake-evac stuff. I keep telling him that when the zombies and bandits come he will thank me, but he just rolls the eyes.
    Good luck, dude

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    • #17
      Wow, sorry to learn of this.

      You don't say too much about how your relationship is otherwise. Good? Great? Poor?

      How has communication been?

      Decide if you love her and if she loves you. I wouldn't rush to kick her to the curb just yet. She's afraid of you. Afraid because she's been programmed to be that way about this subject. You've seen it on TV too, some guy goes nuts. That's what she has on her mind. That's why she thinks counselling is the answer.

      Now, if communication is still possible, I would back off for a while. Keep doing your thing, but more low key. Give it a cooling off period. Maybe then when her fear has subsided, she can hear your message. But start again with the message slowly. Can you show her how you arrived at your fears? Show her government reports (she might respect that) on disaster preparedness. Even the gov't says everyone should have three days of supplies.

      Can you reason with her that "an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure". That if nothing ever happens, they at worst you've spent some money on a "different kind of hobby", but at BEST it could save your lives? That's a pretty good cost/benefit arguement, don't you think?

      Messy divorces can be pure hell - especially if there are kids in the picture, so it's best to try to find a way to keep her. And it isn't easy being single - good partners are hard to find.

      I really do hope that helps.

      I'll be keeping you in my thoughts. Best of luck to you.

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      • #18
        I didn't start serious prepping until the fall of last year. The possibility of an Obama administration got me on the fast track in a hurry. Better late that never right? I look back on the past 6 or 7 months and I see now that it had to be a strain on my wife dealing with such a quick and drastic change in my behavior. I heard the words paranoid, hermit, crazy, tinfoil hat, conspiracy, and Off the deep end, more than I want to admit.... Until one day she was talking to one of her friends from church, and found that they had started a little prepping of their own due to the political climate. She found that in our Sunday school class there were even more families in varying stages of prep. Now she feels better knowing that others that she knows and respects are in this mind set as well. The garden project has done wonders for the whole family's outlook (except for my 16 year old son who is very happy being miserable at all times, while doing his best to make all those around him miserable as well..... I mentioned he's 16 right?) My wife and daughter have been very excited about the garden, and I only wish I had started one years ago.

        I've tried to get her to look over XColony, but she's not quite ready for this much information..... yet:cool:
        The 12ga.... It's not just for rabbits anymore.

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        • #19
          Originally posted by waitnc View Post
          Zombie Axe,

          I am feeling for you brother, I once had a spouse like that and I gave in and sold off some good guns and good ammo to shut her mouth up. But, I gave her the big D and have replaced her with a very like minded woman. No more long explanations needed, no political agruements. She thanks me for opening her eyes. I am not telling you to replace her but, if your life was like mine I would consider it. Better to have a "Partner" then "baggage".
          Sorry for the confusion wnc... my wife is onboard 100% :) However I have friends whose 'wives' don't get it :(
          73

          later,
          ZA

          Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to
          beat you to death with it because it is empty.

          The faster you finish the fight, the less shot you will get.

          Comment


          • #20
            Wait till she has to deal with grocery store shortages, or like we did go 2 weeks without power and running water due to an ice storm. That has a way of convincing people.

            Does she think that in an emergency that the Govt will take care of her. If she does show her pictures of the New Orleans and the Stadium. Explain to her that she is only a body when it comes to govt and is she willing to live that way or to be bussed half way across a nation to some unfamiliar place and just dropped off. Explain to her that she will be sleeping next to a man that no one knows anything about. She might end up in a tent city or a formaldehyde infested trailer. She needs some sort of SERIOUS WAKE UP CALL and explain to her the weapons only for a means of protecting the ones you LOVE and to keep someone from taking our food.

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            • #21
              Howdy, Combat!

              Changes tend to be easier to handle for all concerned when they are done in gradual bite-size amounts. So instead of spending the paycheck on a stockpile, try just getting together a BOB and a few extra non-perishables. Try it this way and you will more than likely sway your wife to your side, and you also won't feel overwhelmed as well.

              Moreover, as slowz1k noted, people are more like to accept change if others like themselves have changed. It's what's known to social psychologists as The Law of Social Proof. If you can introduce her to other prepared people to whom she can relate, it might make Preparedness easier for her to accept and practice. Refer her to the government's own Web Sites like Ready.gov when they support Preparedness.

              Also, reframe what you're doing in a way she might like. When you modify the house to make the family safer, tell her you are improvising like Bob Vila or Ty Pennington would. Make a Martha Stewart or Rachel Ray recipe with your Preparedness stockpile, then echo "YUM-O!" and "It's A Good Thing!" from the depths of your fallout shelter.

              Also, try to practice Preparedness in a way that doesn't attack things she holds dear. Don't put the First Aid Kit where she normally keeps her stash of make-up and perfume or crowd out her Prada shoes with the Hazmat equipment. Have space for Preparedness items and have space for her items and make sure you each respect the others' space.

              Also--and this is what I'm struggling with in my own efforts--make Preparedness simple. Preparedness is more in the head than anything else and requires only relatively few things that are well-maintained. When Preparedness is simple, it is easier to integrate into your daily routine.

              I hope all of this makes your efforts better and maybe turns your wife around. In any event, do what it takes to preserve all that you hold dear and let others who don't share your values go their own way at their own risk and expense.
              "Apocalypse is by no means inevitable." --Jim Rice.

              Comment


              • #22
                Originally posted by TheUnboundOne View Post
                Howdy, Combat!

                Changes tend to be easier to handle for all concerned when they are done in gradual bite-size amounts. So instead of spending the paycheck on a stockpile, try just getting together a BOB and a few extra non-perishables. Try it this way and you will more than likely sway your wife to your side, and you also won't feel overwhelmed as well.

                Moreover, as slowz1k noted, people are more like to accept change if others like themselves have changed. It's what's known to social psychologists as The Law of Social Proof. If you can introduce her to other prepared people to whom she can relate, it might make Preparedness easier for her to accept and practice. Refer her to the government's own Web Sites like Ready.gov when they support Preparedness.

                Also, reframe what you're doing in a way she might like. When you modify the house to make the family safer, tell her you are improvising like Bob Vila or Ty Pennington would. Make a Martha Stewart or Rachel Ray recipe with your Preparedness stockpile, then echo "YUM-O!" and "It's A Good Thing!" from the depths of your fallout shelter.

                Also, try to practice Preparedness in a way that doesn't attack things she holds dear. Don't put the First Aid Kit where she normally keeps her stash of make-up and perfume or crowd out her Prada shoes with the Hazmat equipment. Have space for Preparedness items and have space for her items and make sure you each respect the others' space.

                Also--and this is what I'm struggling with in my own efforts--make Preparedness simple. Preparedness is more in the head than anything else and requires only relatively few things that are well-maintained. When Preparedness is simple, it is easier to integrate into your daily routine.

                I hope all of this makes your efforts better and maybe turns your wife around. In any event, do what it takes to preserve all that you hold dear and let others who don't share your values go their own way at their own risk and expense.
                +1776, great advice.

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                • #23
                  x

                  I agree with the Unbound One. I've been thinking about this a bit and you also need to keep in mind the outsiders view...the Coresh Compound, Stargate Cult, Ruby Ridge (If I remember correctly)...All outsiders saw was another group of 'end of the world' freaks which have been around in different stripes since the turn of the 20th century. It becomes a belief system in and of itself that doomers are all crazies and religo-nuts. It's also hard for some people to wrap their head around the concept that all the trappings of our lifestyle can dissapear overnight. That the delivery trucks would NOT just keep showing up, that the electricity wouldn't come back on. But we know that it CAN. Case in point, the midwest floods. And Katrina, on a shorter time scale. A strike on the docks in CA or WA makes for scarcity and price jumps here in AK.
                  If you have invested alot of yourself and love this woman, I would offer the advice of taking the long view. Maybe she can be brougt around little by little. But, if your world views are so differnt and will never blend together by compromise, you may need to cut your losses. Look at other parts of your life together. Is this one of many areas or is this the only one that you dissagree? Ultimately, it is your (plural) decision how hard to work on this issue. But you BOTH must want to work. I wish you luck, man. You married her for a reason, so hopefully that reason still trumps all else.
                  Last edited by brennatov; 04-24-2009, 06:25 PM.

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                  • #24
                    Buy both seasons of Jericho. Watch them together. It worked to convince my wife to start prepping. If it works for you ask her what areas she would like to work on.

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                    • #25
                      Sandhillbilly? Why are you punishing theother squirrel?
                      Waitnc

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